Ashcroft vs Nude Statue
Attorney General John Ashcroft objected to the semi-nude female statue in the Justice Department building's Great Hall. He didn't like being photographed at events in the Great Hall with the statue's exposed aluminum breast in the background. The statue's title is Spirit of Justice, though it's colloquially known as "Minnie Lou." According to Beverley Lumpkin, some news photographers make a point of angling their shots to get that particular statue in frame.
The most famous pictures of all were shot when former U.S. Attorney General Edwin Meese proudly released the final report of his commission on pornography. No one in the Great Hall that day could ever forget the spectacle of the still photographers writhing on the floor, flat on their backs, in order to grab the shot of Meese holding up the porn report with Minnie Lou's breast over his shoulder.
Ashcroft solved the problem by ordering massive draperies to cover the offensive statue at a cost of $8000. There are so many obvious jokes here, it's hard to know where to begin. So let me just say: what an asshole.
ABC News (Jan 2002)
Press release posted at whitehouse.org: John Ashcroft announces Operation Mummified Sculptural Genitalia. "Beginning today, over four hundred (400) federal agents will begin fanning out across America, where they will storm the perverted ramparts of any and all public buildings, parks, and museums which harbor objectionable 'art.' While most offending works will be shrouded in draperies or clad in over-sized Brooks Brothers suits, some (most notably the Statue of Liberty) will undergo extensive artistic revisions, while yet others will find their repulsive intercourse muscles wrapped snugly and permanently in cocoons of industrial strength duct tape."
The White House (Jan 2002)
UPDATE: Ashcroft's spokesperson denies that the Attorney General had any involvement in requesting draperies to cover the semi-nude statues in the Justice Department's Great Hall. "The attorney general does not get involved in these types of things. He has bigger things to worry about than draping statues." So why the cover-up? "[Spokesperson Barbara] Comstock said a Justice advance person came up with the idea because a blue backdrop is TV-friendlier than shapely aluminum." . . . Debra at Pursed Lips links to another story about the denial and points out the suspiciousness of Ashcroft's spokesperson bearing the surname "Comstock."
Washington Post | New York Post (Jan 2002)
Ashcroft's draperies recall a similar incident from 1991, when a female Penn State professor objected to having a reproduction of Goya's painting The Naked Maja displayed in her lecture hall. She successfully petitioned the university to remove the reproduction, on the grounds that it created a chilling classroom environment for her and female students. That incident was widely and properly belittled as an example of political correctness run amok.
